haha, good ol chuck

Polish version:

www.chucknorris.pv.pl

LOL nice, haven't heard many of this, though in Poland now is really Norrismania. I'm not opening a fridge, cause i'm afraid of getting a roundhouse kick in my face;)

My others favorites are:
Before he forgot a gift for Chuck Norris, Santa Claus was real.

When an episode of Walker Texas Ranger was aired in France, the French surrendered to Chuck Norris just to be on the safe side.

A handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.

Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell them there was a stripper in it.

Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a fucking Indian.

Chuck Norris, Vin Diesel and Arnold Schwarzenegger have all died and are in Heaven. Each of them hope to occupy the seat next to God. God asks Vin Diesel why he thinks he should have the seat and Vin replies, "I believe... I should have the seat because of the virtuosity in my toughness and pride." Arnie says, "I believe... that I should be the one sitting next to you because of all my achievements." God then turns to Chuck Norris, who replies with, "I believe... you are sitting in my seat."

Chuck Norris uses anaconda as condom.

Chuck Norris is a father of half of Brazilian people. You can't explain their football phenomen in other way.(free translation from polish)

The Dinosaurs looked at Chuck Norris the wrong way once. ONCE.

Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Chuck Norris.

The original title for Alien vs. Predator was Alien and Predator vs Chuck Norris. The film was cancelled shortly after going into preproduction. No one would pay nine dollars to see a movie fourteen seconds long.