Teddy Pooh and Piglet sat in the shadow under a tree.
In the hollow of the tree can be heard buzzing.
At one time Piglet reached into the hole and licked his hand and frowned.
He turned to Teddy and said:
- Pooh, bees in the tree made ​​a very strange honey.
Pooh reached into the hole, licked his paw and said:
- This are not bees, this are flies.

Gencho, you are arrested for illegal alcohol production.
- I ma not produce.
- Here - you have a cauldron of boiling brandy.
- Will you arrest me for rape too?
- Why?
- Because i have a 'tool' for rape too, so...

Did you hear about the Yank and the Pom? They were sitting in La Guardia Airport waiting for their planes and they got talking about the differences between the American and English sense of humour. Both agreed that they found the other's sense of humour hard to understand. The Yank said 'Why don't you tell me one of your jokes and I will tell you one of mine and we can examine the differences'. 'OK' said the Pom, 'Here is a typical English joke. There was a crossroads and up one leg of the crossroads came a double decker London bus. Up the other comes a chap on a motor bike, up the other comes a chap riding a horse and up the last one comes a lovely young lass. Well the question is which one of them knew her?' The Yank shook his head sadly and said he didn't know. 'Well' said the Pom 'The fact is that the horseman knew her (horse manure)'. The yank looked at the Pom in amazement. 'Is that a joke?' he said. 'Yes' said the Pom 'That is a typical English joke.

'Well' said the Yank 'Let me tell you a typical American Joke. We like jingles in our jokes and here is a typical American jingle: There was a young fellow called Skinner, who took a young lass out to dinner, they sat down to dine, at a quarter past nine, and at a quarter past ten it was in her: No no no, it was not Skinner who was in her, but the dinner was in her, right!' The Pom shook his head sadly, saying that the American sense of humour was quite beyond his comprehension.

So they caught their planes home. When the Yank got home he went down to his club and gathered his friends around him. 'Guess what' he said 'When I was waiting for my plane at La Guardia I met this ridiculous Englishman who told me this completely crazy joke which I can't make head or tail of. It goes like this. There is a crossroads. Down one leg of the cross roads comes a Greyhound bus, down another one comes a bloke on a Harley, down the other one comes a cowboy and down the last one comes a luscious looking young chick. Well the question is which one of them knew her?' He looked around his friends to see if anyone of them had the answer. 'Well' he said 'I couldn't figure it out either, but the answer is Horse Shit!' They all agreed that the English sense of humour is incomprehensible.

When the Englishman got home he went down to his club and gathered his friends around him. 'Guess what' he said ' When I was waiting for my plane at La Guardia Airport I met this ridiculous Yank who told me this completely incomprehensible jingle. I couldn't make head or tail of it. It goes like this. There was a young fellow called Tupper, who took a young lass out to supper, they sat down to dine, at a quarter past nine, and at a quarter past ten it was up her. No no no, it was not Tupper who was up her. It was some frightful bounder called Skinner!'